Random Acts of Kindness and Calorie Counting

Dear John,

Your dad and I have been watching our calories and working out a lot in the last year.  It's led to a lot of good things but it hasn't changed the way I feel about food... especially chocolate.  I moderate my chocolate cravings by keeping Dove chocolates around.  They are about 50 calories a piece and pretty satisfying.  Any other chocolate really can't be in the house.

So today when I told you that you could have a cookie from the Monument Cafe, that's all I wanted to buy: one cookie.  Any more than that is pure temptation for me.  Unfortunately, when I asked about the cookies, I found out that they only sell them in bags of six.

Some day, I hope to be able to have a bag of six cookies in the house, but now's not the day.  I tried to give the other cookies back to the lady, but she wouldn't take them and told me to freeze them.  Freezing them made me think of the other kind of cookies people freeze: Girl Scout Cookies.  I made it through Girl Scout cookie season with the genius plan of buying cookies only for troops... you pay the girl scout, supporting her fund raising, and the Girl Scouts of America send the cookies overseas.  Win-win.  And also, in my weight loss, I have learned that the only people who need to be eating all of the extra calories in things like Girl Scout Cookies are people burning lots of extra calories... like soldiers.

So, back to the five cookies (since you and your sister did eat the one).  I wasn't mailing them and I'm not sure where to find soldiers in Georgetown, so who else burns a lot of calories and deserves sweet appreciation?

Firefighters.

So we went to the local fire station and presented them with our problem of too many cookies.  They said they could totally take care of that and then they told us that their fire truck tours had recently changed in price from $26 to five cookies.  Our lucky day, I guess.

You were very shy around the firemen at first, but they were sweet and you warmed up to them.

 Especially when they let you drive their fire engine.

I know it was a completely random thing to do... taking cookies to firemen.  It makes me think of some of the random ideas my mother used to have.  She would say things like that, like "we should take these to firemen" but then she has your initial shyness in social situations and so she would think on it and wind up changing her mind.

So I hope I can teach you both, the random ideas, and the ways to get past the moment where you ring the doorbell on the fire station and wonder what in the world this fireman is going to say to you and just do it.

Because chances are, he's going to say "thanks for the cookies."

Love,
Mom

Time with Fords

 Dear John,

You call this little girl "Bina" which is short for Sabrina.  You like her a lot and it is so utterly adorable to see you interact with her.

The Fords came over the other night and you and Sabrina and your sister and I played and read books for a bit.

Then we went out tonight with the Fords to celebrate Mrs. Ford's birthday.  I was holding Sabrina, so you worked your way into Mrs. Ford's lap... if your mama could have her baby, then she could hold you!

Mostly, though, you were very busy with fries all evening and didn't seem to mind that I was holding Sabrina for most of the meal.

I am so glad that you have gotten to enjoy Sabrina and don't have a lot of jealously over her and that any jealously you do have can be solved by a little extra attention from Mr. and Mrs. Ford.

Love,
Mom

Tough Love

To Whom It May Concern,

I am leaving this toy airplane here because my son pitched a fit over it in the parking lot.  If you find it and have a boy of your own, please take it home to him and may he be better behaved than my son has been this evening.

[Dear John, I would attach a picture of said plane, but it's now sitting outside of a Wells Fargo bank next to a rock which is holding down a ticket stub from one of our Houston adventures with a note of that exact sentiment if not the exact wording.  I hope you are one step closer to learning to control that temper, sweet boy.  Love, Mom]

Butterfly Boy in the Forest

 Dear John,

There are not many places I would let you dress up as "Butterfly Boy."  My mother's heart is too sensitive to the possibility of a poor reaction to let you have such a flamboyant look just out and about town, at least until you are old enough to understand the look of judgement and how little it has to do with you.

 But a renaissance fair is pretty much a place free of judgement of any sort.  And so I opened up the discussion of what to wear with the open ended "who do you want to be tomorrow" and when "butterfly boy" was your answer, we ran with it.

You saw many other butterflies at the fair, although admittedly they were all little girls.  You also noticed that while all of them had wings, you were the only one with a hat.  I think I detected a trace of pride when you said that to me.

In addition to Butterfly, we had Emp'r Zana (who looked a lot like your sister), your dad, me and the Robinsons.  I told Mrs. Robinson that you and your sister would be dressing up and that Andrew might want to wear some of his more fun or costumy or just not-normal everyday wear clothes.  She looked at me, paused, looked down and said, "Um, all he has is normal clothes."  Right.  Not everyone has a whole slew of fabulous looks to chose from on Ren Fair day.  I told her I guessed it was part of her job to help Andrew feel good about being normal in such zany company as it was my job to help you and your sister feel good about being so colorful in a world that loves normalcy.  What a blessing to have such balancing friendships!

 At the fair, you enjoyed some shows.  One was a dog show.

The other a musician who let you kids come up to the stage to perform with him.

 You and I rode the carousel.

 You and your dad did the ponies.

 You and your sister did the big joust ride.

Mostly, though, you just enjoyed the time with your sister and the Robinsons.  You love that family so much.  Even after a whole day with them, you were asking if we could go see them some more.

I am glad that your sister has such a wonderful best buddy and I am glad that they let you tag along with them with so little fuss.

And I hope that I don't seem like a self absorbed mother when I say that despite all of the fun you had and all of the things you and your sister did, my very favorite part of the whole day was shopping for myself.

I have wanted a real ren fair outfit for as long as I can remember.  In high school, I had no where to wear it and no money to spend on it.  In college, I started gaining weight and by the time I got to two-fifty, it no longer seemed like the kind of thing I would want to spend money on... knowing it wouldn't be the look I was trying for in my mind's eye.  So of all of the things I have bought for my smaller frame, this is the one I am most excited about.  And the best part is that the laces have a lot of give in them and the whole thing can be tightened down if I continue to lose weight.

I love that your dad bought this for me.  I love that he admired me so much in it.  We went to Sherwood Forest as a family, but it felt more like a date with children tagging along.  I loved it.  And I truly believe that your life and your sister's will be better if your dad and I treat more of these kinds of outings that way.  There is plenty of time for you to have fun and do things you want to do.  We only have a decade or so to model the kind of marriage we hope you will strive for as adult.

Love,
Mom

Art in the Digital Age

 Dear John,

Of all of the extra things your dad and I do for you (beyond the feeding and clothing), I think one of the most important is the way we try to expose you and your sister to the arts.  The creation of art is one of the things that signifies a developed society to me.  The only way artists are free to create and perform is if the rest of the society is willing and able to support their art.  I think our lives are enriched by the beauty around us and if we don't stop to attend to it then we are the ones lacking.

Media, computers, the internet, television, all of it makes our world so much smaller, so much more accessible, and I think it waters down the experience of the artistic, sometimes.  If I want to see a musical, I can download it, get on Netflicks, look on cable, or just stream it on a phone.  But none of those compare to the experience of seeing it on stage.  I think of the future as seen on Wall-E where all of humanity is limited not only to simply watching virtual reproductions of performances, but physically unable to reproduce the kinds of amazing acts of physical beauty that we see in ballet, in gymnastics and in sports.

The digital age can give us so much, but it cannot provide the power of a live performance and the world can be at our fingertips but a live stage performance is always as far away as the closest company.  With all of that in mind, supporting the arts in Austin and making sure you and your sister get to have as much exposure as possible, is very important to me and your dad.

Which is why on Sunday we went to the Ballet Austin's second kids' performance.  We had gone to Peter and the Wolf in the fall and we all loved it, so we felt pretty sure that we would like this one as well.

The show took the right sorts of liberties with the very grim Grimm's fairy tale.  In this version, the loving parents don't actually send the children away.  Instead, the father gives the mother a vacuum cleaner (no one knows why) which she loves (also for unknown reasons) and Hansel and Gretel play with it (of course) and then break it (no surprise) and run away from to avoid being in trouble.  You and your sister laughed and laughed as the children broke that vacuum cleaner!

The whole show was done with eight dancers and was far more focused on German polka music and movement than it was the tale of Hansel and Gretel.  They also had these two narrow tables and did a lot of cool movements involving dancers going under and over the tables, dancing with them and around them.  In the end, the witch is tied to one and then pushed off stage.

The grand finale, though, wasn't the victory over the witch, or even the children's homecoming.  It was the father repairing the vacuum cleaner.

Very funny.  Very silly.  Very German.  And very kid friendly.

I am so glad we took you to see it and I'm glad I got to see it.  What a great city we live in to have such wonderful kid productions so available.

Love,
Mom

Just John and Mama

Dear John,

Today was just you and me.  I can't remember the last time we went somewhere just the two of us.  It was lovely.

I took you to the Nature Center first.  We walked around at your pace and looked at everything you wanted to see.

The big wooden sign that I normally take pictures in front of was gone... possibly for repair, possibly for good.  It was weird to think that there will be pictures of us in front of that sign and you won't remember it.

You were in full imagination mode today.  You were a Super Friend (as a result of watching a lot of the 80's cartoon Super Friends).  You even tied on your cape.

And you put on your mask.

Then we were ready to run around the Nature Center.  And we did run.  After a year of weight loss and exercise, I can outrun you, sweet boy, and that was a glorious feeling.

We dug in the Dino Pit for a while.  Normally we go in the warm part of spring and into the summer and the Dino Pit is scorchingly hot, but today it was perfect.

I don't think I had appreciated how much of your attention for activities is brought to you by your sister and her constant entertainment value in your life.  You had a great time at the Nature Center, but were done in about forty-five minutes.  Since we were already in south Austin, I took you over to the big Zilker Park playground.

 

You even got to eat the snack your daddy packed especially for you because, as he said, "Mrs. Robinson won't be there" and she and Mrs. Hazen are your normal go-to sources for snacks on outings.


Once again, although you had a great time, something was missing, and I'm pretty sure it was your sister.  You normally run all around a playground like this, but you were very wary of the other kids and would only approach a structure if it was completely devoid of other children.  You actually got in trouble at the sand box for throwing sand.  It took me a while to realize that you were trying to create a sand play area off to the side where there were no other kids.  Once I explained that the only way to play with sand would be to get in the sand box with the two other children, both of whom were preschoolers like yourself, you decided to abandon the sand box completely.

We also went to Anna's Toy Depot where I found a few legos I wanted and two instruction manuals I had lost, and then we went out to lunch at the Olive Garden.  We came home for our nap (well, my nap, you just kicked me a lot and watched Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog) and then I took you up to my school to play before we went over to the Robinson's for dinner (see, son, Mrs. Robinson still fed you today).

It was a wonderful day and I know you enjoyed it so much because you have told me about twenty times today that you love me and another dozen or so times that you like me and then, to drive your point home, you even said specifically that you had "so much fun" today.

Today made me realize, though, that we don't do this enough.  You don't have a clear idea of how to be out and about without your big sister and I don't have a clear idea of how to entertain just you.  I am so grateful for the sibling bond between the two of you that I haven't thought about the time you might need alone with a parent.  We'll work on that.

Because while I adore how close you and your sister are right now,

I want to make sure you get the independence you are going to need in a world that won't always accommodate having your big sister by your side.

(Even though one of my greatest hopes for you is that you and your sister will always maintain this great relationship you have right now.)

Love,
Mom

Being a Part of Church

Dear John,

Two weeks ago was Children's Sunday at church.  It was also the Sunday before the week we thought you had chicken pox.

You were the usher that Sunday.  That means you handed out bulletins, and possibly little bits of that unnamed virus you and your sister had.  It's one of the reasons we were quite relieved that it was not, after all, the chicken pox.  (Hello, good morning, would like a bulletin and some chicken pox this morning?)

In addition to handing out bulletins, you got to pass the offering plate.  You loved this job, but kept trying to take the change back out.  I think you wanted to be able to put those shiny coins in yourself.

I love this tradition in the church.  I love that at two, you are taught that you have a role in the worship service of our church.  Next year, you will probably get to usher again.  The year after that, you might get to do like your sister did this year and say the passing of the peace.  Every year your role and responsibility in this service will grow, just as I pray your relationship with God will grow in the same time.

This year, it was all about the shiny money, the stomping on the big open area in the front of the church.  One day, though, it will mean so much more, and I think you will be made ready for that day by participating in days like this as a toddler.

Love,
Mom